"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

Ringing in the New Year!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

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At this very second, some of you have already entered the new year. Some of you are waiting for it to happen in approximately 36 minutes. Some of you have to wait even longer than that.

Some of you are passed out drunk. Some of you are alone. Some of you are regretting that person you kissed at midnight. Some of you are wishing that your midnight kiss is going to be with that special someone. Some of you are already taking in your two hours of 2012 with a good nights sleep.

But me... I'm at home with my family. Starting our New Years tradition of movie marathoning. We have already watched Captain America (way better than I was expecting), Water for Elephants (excellent! Can't wait to read the book), and Hanna (saw it with my sister previously and thought it was alright. What was I thinking?! Obviously I was on some kind of pain killers or in a state of utter confusion because that movie was horrible. I just wasted 2 hours of my life. Turns out... I wasted 4!! When will I learn!?).

Tomorrow we have Unknown, Super 8, The Help... and possibly Crazy Stupid Love if I can convince my Dad to watch it with us. Love that movie. Love Ryan Gosling! I don't think I am going to win my father over with Ryan Gosling's incredible charm or looks.

So, no parties for me. No boys to kiss at midnight. No drinks to be had (actually my mom and I are enjoying some refreshing Mike's Hard Lemonade so that is always fun). No fancy dress. No fireworks, or streamers, or sparklers. Just movies.

And as my friends text me to get together and asked what I was up to over and over, I didn't feel the slightest bit of regret to saying no. This is possibly the last year in a very long time... if not ever that I will be spending New Years with my family. So no, I don't want to party or put on sparkly makeup. I don't want to watch the ball drop in a crowded room half filled with strangers half filled with close friends. I want to spend it here, on my couch in my comfy pajamas with my family.

2011 was such an amazing year. I met amazing people. A city full of wonder and magic (Boston). I had new adventures in D.C., Maryland, Virginia, and New Orleans, NYC, Pennsylvania. I reconnected with old friends. I lost friends. I was excited as my sister moved away and entered a new life for herself in Pennsylvania. I fell down some stairs. I became an alumni of Pi Beta Phi. I turned 21. I cried. I let people go. I karaoked.  For a whole wonderful year I lived. Which is more than anybody can even hope for.

So no. I am not going to break tradition this year just because I am expected to go out with everybody. Not when this is the last year I won't have to break tradition.

This year was beyond spectacular... why would I start 2012 off with anything different?

And just like that... 2011 slips into 2012 seamlessly.  And I just have this feeling that something spectacular is going to happen this year... either the end of the world or something much much better ;)

Lets Karaoke

Friday, December 30, 2011

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This past week was kind of a crazy week. I had family in town and of course there was Christmas. But I also had errands and appointments and lots of good times with my sister and friends.

I think the highlight of the week though was Wednesday night. We went down to our neighbor's house for dinner where we had tostadas compuestas... my favorite meal that they make. It is literally to die for. Even right now, my mouth is watering just thinking about it. After dinner, my sister and approximately half of the population of Las Cruces under the age of 30 that are still in town for the holidays (which isn't that many people in actuality)... and those who were too bored to stay in Albuquerque headed to the Pan American stadium to watch NMSU vs. UNM basketball.

I was being lazy and wanted to stay home so I didn't attend this event. Good thing too because NMSU got our butts handed to us on a shiny silver platter. I think we ended up losing by 22 or so. Because of this, everybody who was at the game left early and headed straight across the street to Dublins. This is one of about 4 bars in town. It's a little classier than Hurricanes but nowhere near as classy as De La Vega's and the fact that it is right across the street from the University makes it the ultimate college bar. It is like the local watering hole. If you ever need to find any body above the age of 21 and under 30 on any given night in the dull city of Cruces I would tell you to look no further than Dublins. And so, as I found out people were leaving early I decided to unravel myself from the pressing duties of laziness and meet up with my friends there.

But what is so special about Wednesdays? Apparently it is karaoke night. We learned this last Wednesday when we suffered through an entire night of ear bleeding musical stylings. But this Wednesday night the crowd was bigger and my friends were drinking more and the music was in the air. Also, on this night I was the designated driver (I was actually the designated driver last Wednesday too come to think of it. Boo.)

I don't drink much to begin with 1. Because it is expensive. 2. Because I have no need to increase the chances of making an idiot out of myself... I do a good enough job of that on my own. 3. Beer makes me really really full. After about 1 glass, my stomach is uncomfortably full and so I just stop. 4. Drinking makes me as pale as a ghost who just saw another ghost. That is an unnatural shade of white if you get my drift. I generally keep a blush compact in my purse and apply it multiple times throughout the night just to look alive. 5. Really, I know I am only 21 but I am getting too old to go out as much as I used to... which even then was never really a lot. I don't know, maybe I'm just naturally a responsible good girl. I'm ok with that.

Whatever the case may be... which I think was mainly because it was my sister's last hurrah before she headed back to Pennsylvania... I said I would be the designated driver. Being the designated driver has many disadvantages and advantages but I can never say it isn't interesting. It is kind of like you are the only one left in reality and you get to watch as people step outside of themselves and become very different people.

So on this night, as my friends were sipping their raspberry long island ice teas... we had a brilliant idea. Lets karaoke. Well this is not a decision that can be taken lightly. You have to scan the room and see who is attendance. You better make sure there is nobody there you truly do not want to see you enter a situation which is bound to have adverse outcomes. The song selection is also a major factor. You can't be one of those people who sings a sad country song because the goal here isn't to depress an entire bar full of people. That is never ok and in most places it is an unforgivable sin to those who have to listen to it.

So my friends, who are currently seeing life through rose colored glasses, decide it is a good idea to sing karaoke as long as we pick fake names (Trishin, Destiny, Lauriweather, Lola, and Paulina). And I somehow hear myself enthusiastically agreeing to this ridiculous plan. It is one thing for them but I am stone cold sober and am not sure how I managed to think this was a good idea. I was Paulina in case you were really wondering.

So five of us go up there and sing Don't Stop Believing by Journey. Which is always a good song to pick. It's Journey for heavens sake. If you don't like Journey, you're insane and should seriously consider having your head examined. I must say though, I am quite peeved that they are trying to make a comeback with a new front man. You can't say you are the same band with a new singer. That's hogwash. Point blank... you get a new singer, you are a new band. Just deal with it and move on Journey!

Anyway, turns out we were good! Pretty darn good... so we were told at least. Well, this dangerously boosted our egos and we decided to get on up and sing another. Spice Girls - Wannabe. What we didn't really take in to account is that since Spice Girls has multiple singers, some lines are said at the same time or overlapping. But we were not clever enough to try and do this. We all tried to say every single line so quickly that it sounded like a discombobulated train wreck. I mean, it was bad... really really bad. I am pretty sure a couple of people left crying and a guy told us we should have stopped while we were ahead. Ya think! I really should have stopped at the word karaoke 3 hours earlier but what can I say, I was born with the innate need to embarrass myself and turns out, I hadn't quite yet filled my December quota.

Regardless, I had a great night with some old and new friends. And if I had to go back, I'd do it all exactly the same.

Now, I must go get ready for the upcoming new year. I suggest you do the same. It is going to be a good one... I can feel it in my bones!


Friday, December 23, 2011

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This has been a wonderful pre-Christmas week.

At my last day of work before Christmas, Wednesday, I found out some interesting things about myself. It was lets pick on Kaitlyn day which I don't mind. I feel sometimes I am so gullible and naive that I deserve this. It started when I was literally elbow deep into a sheeps rumen collecting their rumen contents. Despite the fact that I smelled the exact opposite of lovely and had a thick layer of rumen liquid pretty much covering every square inch of my body. For those of you who have not worked with ruminant animals. Here is the low down... Ruminant animals are those who have 1 stomach with 4 compartments. The largest compartment being the rumen where bacteria breaks down a good portion of their food before it actually passes to their intestines and what not. So this rumen fluid we sample we are looking at the bacterial content... bacteria smell. Let me tell you. They smell really really bad. But, despite this fact, I was excited because I said that in less than 1 hour we were already half way through. Which I was thrilled about because everybody thought it was going to be a dreadfully long day.

One of my co-workers quickly told me to be quiet and not jinx our luck! From this started the conversation about how I was so optimistic. Which really was the biggest shock I have ever heard. Not once in my entire life have I ever been called optimistic. This is because I'm rather skeptical and realistic... and to be honest pretty pessimistic about life's outcomes. I am definitely the glass is not even half empty... it's actually three quarters empty and there is a whole in the bottom of the cup. So the rest of the contents are about to be on the floor.

But my coworkers started talking about how I am the one person in our lab who is actually positive about the outcomes of our experiments and the time it takes to get them done. With this it was decided that research was the perfect field for me because of this. Which made me feel pretty darn good. At least I am going into a field I enjoy and can hopefully continue to be positive about, when everything else in life sucks!

Just kidding. Life is pretty good actually, considering. I did not however get the HHMI fellowship I applied for. But honestly, I wasn't expecting to. When they only pick about 9 people out of hundreds and I didn't get to spend as much time on my application as I would have liked... I find it quite understandable that I didn't receive it. I do feel a little disappointed in Charbie though. I think he has officially abandoned me. Or maybe he is just working hard on those grad school applications for me and couldn't allocate his time appropriately. I am choosing to believe that for now.

But the best part of this all is that work is done for a while. The sheep trial is over and now we just have to run the samples up in the lab. But what this all really means is that I don't have to wake up at 5:30 every morning for a while!! It means I had time to actually go to a bar and hang with people and get in at 1:30 in the morning because I didn't have to wake up early. Granted I woke up at 7 yesterday and 4:10 today. Which really ticked me off! But I didn't have to leave... I could at least sit in my bed and pretend to myself I was sleeping in a little more. And I have time to take a nap now so it really doesn't matter. Oh sleep, I have missed you so much!

With work closing though, means I don't get to see my sheepy. I don't actually like the sheeps. But they have become familiar little annoying faces in their pens. Most of which have been named due distinguishing characteristics or personalities. Some names like Pauli, Smalls, Stompy, Charlie (as in Charlie Sheen... he's beyond crazy. As a matter of fact, he has tackled me. Twice. I don't care for this sheep), Blue... you get the picture.

But one sheep, my favorite sheep, was not deemed worthy enough to receive a name. They said he was too plain and rather boring. But he was so nice. Mr. 1079 aka Pen 15. He let me pet him and was never really afraid of me. So I took pictures with him and started singing "Talking bought my best friend." That is when my coworker decided on a name for him. He is Big and I am Rob. You know, Rob and Big? If you don't know who they are I feel very sad for you. You should watch Rob and Big or Fantasy Factory. They're pretty hilarious. Big is Rob's body guard and I feel this adequately describes our relationship. So I must say I will miss him. But he is out gallivanting around the outdoor pasture... enjoying the freedom!

Also, today I woke up to snow again. Twice in 1 month is pretty darn impressive for Cruces. Quite a lot actually. I hope it continues to snow and stays in place until Christmas. The last time we had a white Christmas I was a little girl. I do miss it.

My mom already had off but my dad didn't. But with the snow came a call from his boss saying he shouldn't come in today because he didn't want him to drive on the icy roads. Oh how I love how our city/state shuts down at the first sign of anything snow. Sorry to all the people trying to come in or leave Cruces though because I don't think the roads are staying open for long.

Just found out that they are now charging for the Yule Log on TV and no longer offering it for free. Oh happy day!! I dislike watching that thing.

Sorry for the randomness of this blog. It is what it is. Now, I am going to enjoy a family breakfast since everybody is home. Then Christmas Eve and Christmas. Even this scrooge is actually rather enjoying the holidays.

Here's to dreaming of  a white Christmas...

Stormin Norman

Monday, December 19, 2011

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With Christmas comes surprise and secrecy. It's a long standing tradition of parents hiding presents from their kids and kids trying so very hard to discover all the wonderful things they got this year.

But me and my sister were never good at keeping secrets or surprises. We are known for getting our parents to tell us what the other daughter is getting for a Christmas gift and then we tell each other. Usually when I buy somebody a gift I get so excited that I have to tell them right away and I ruin my own surprise. It's like I physically can't contain it. This year I have cured that disease by just not buying anybody presents. It's amazing how easy it is to not blab if you don't have anything to blab about. I don't suppose this is going to go over really well though so maybe I should think about getting to the store sometime this week. And by store I mean online shopping markets. Get real if you think I am braving the crazies that only come out during Christmas. Do you think I'm nuts!?

In short though, I'm not good with the secrets thing. I can indeed keep a secret... but I don't like to. It's too much responsibility. And quite frankly I have to consciously think about the words coming out of my mouth so I don't screw it up. Do you think I regularly use a filter? If you've figured anything from this blog... it's probably that I don't often filter my thoughts.

At least that is what it appears like. I do actually filter my thoughts though. It is just that the holes on my filter are so incredibly large that only things that are actually caught and held back from the world are the thoughts that are so ludicrous or offensive. I find this is good enough. If I was to use a more efficient filter, like normal folk... I would just sit here. Literally, no words or thoughts would escape me and wouldn't that be dull!? I think all muscles in my body would atrophy until eventually I was a puddle of nothingness on the couch under my high school throw blanket. And then my dog would come sit on me because apparently he has decided this is his blanket and not mine and steals it every chance he gets.

So yes, here I am a puddle of nothingness under a blanket, under my dog, lost to the world... which is why I said to hell with it and chucked the "normal people" filter a long long time ago. And now, all I am left with is the "Stormin Norman" filter. That is what I named it. I feel it adequately sums up the amount of work it actually does for me. Sometimes, I wish I was able to get the "normal people" filter back just so I could exchange it out every once in a while. Once, I did actually find it. It was hidden in a box of goodies labeled 3rd grade year. I put it on for a day... a solid day! But it was too much hassle. It always got clogged and I spent more time cleaning it out than anything thing else. And let me tell you, cleaning up backed up thoughts and words caught in your filter is not pretty. It can get rather... messy and loud. Surprisingly loud. I'm way too lazy to clean up that kind of mess.

I should mention I am also a rationalizer. I do this to make myself feel better about things. Which is what I just did above if you didn't realize it. Hey, I'm not perfect. I admit it.

According to Urban Dictionary (the most reputable dictionary I can think of): Rationalize: To make excuses by masking own flaws/insecurities by explaining one's own reasoning/actions, often used to avoid the real reason or reality when all it does it make one small, simple & scared.

According to Merriam-Webster Dictionary (a dramatically less accurate version of the truth): Rationalize: To bring into accord with reason or cause something to seem reasonable.

I'm mentioning rationalization now because I was thinking: "Hey isn't there that quote that goes something along the lines of - You shouldn't bottle up your thoughts and emotions. I should go search google and try to find something about this so I can justify it on my blog to everybody that not having a filter is actually a sane thing to do!"

So that is what I did. I used my best friend google to search quotes. Do you know what the first thing I found!?

Friends, this does not bode well for my outcomes in life. I gotta say, the duck is making me feel a little better though.
And then I got over it when I find the most perfect quote I have ever read. It describes my life to a T. It even has sheep in it. It's pretty awesome and I think I may put this on my blog page.

"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life." - Hervey Taylor IV (whoever that is?)

Wait a second... somehow I don't believe I got on the computer to write this. That's because I was supposed to be writing about keeping secrets and I got wildly off topic. It's because once again Stormin Norman isn't doing its job about filtering things. Sometimes getting ridiculous amounts of sidetracked is a side effect.

And now I find that this blog is becoming rather lengthy and I don't have room to give the justice of the secrets that I have been keeping so close for so long.

So lets just be quick and to the point. I can finally talk about it because the surprises already happened yesterday at our big dinner get together on the pretense of my Dad's birthday dinner. 1. My sister came home! She was surprising my grandparents. 2. My old friend from down the street came home. He was fighting in Afghanistan and wasn't supposed to be back until January. But with the help of his sister he rigged a plan to get here before Christmas and surprise everybody.

I'm so very happy to have everybody back and safe and home where they should be for the holidays. Plus it helps to have the sister back (aka the favorite child) because now my mom took the week off to spend with her and now has time to make all kinds of  holiday treats... which truly means I do not have to partake in cookie making this year. It's really the best gift somebody could give me.

I'm hoping I get the chance to one-sidedly converse with you all before Christmas which is six days away... but if I don't. I hope you all have a safe and happy holiday season and enjoy a good wood burning fire and some legit hot chocolate made from actual chocolate bars (not that lame powder stuff). The first of which I just need to convince my father to brave the cold and chop up some wood when he gets home. The second of which I am going to guilt my mother into making by playing the poor-me-I-know-I'm-not-your-favorite-child card. Oh the true spirit of the holidays...

Oh. My. God. I just tried to guilt my mother into making hot chocolate and she said she never actually made it with real chocolate. She always used the powder stuff and then lied to us... my whole life is a lie! I am officially crushed.

Edge of Glory

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

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I am sorry. I have been unable to communicate for the week. Why? I lost the spark, the fire... my funny. I don't know that I have it back but I decided to come out of my troll cave and say hi to everybody. Hi.

So... I finished finals last Thursday. It was amazing. My last final was microbial genetics. I was up until 2:30 in the morning at Ihop studying for it. Then I woke up at 6:30 to continue studying for it until my final at 10:30... which I aced in case you were wondering. After the final I ran out to the streets of campus jumping, skipping, yelling out with glee and expletives because I was overcome with joy. At least, that is what I did in my head. In reality, I took my peppermint chocolate cupcake (provided to us by the teacher... she gets extra points in my book for that!) and walked the five minute walk to my car. Which actually took a good 20 minutes in my sluggishness.

It was the most excruciating walk of my life. It was cold. My unwashed hair was sprawled across my face peeking out from my cupcake beanie and I trudged all the way to the muddy southside parking lot. People avoided me on this walk... I am almost positive I look like I got in a fight and I had just miserably lost. My eyes were bloodshot from exhaustion and I had purple bags around them. It didn't help that my eyeliner was smeared everywhere giving me that raccoon look. I held my cupcake like I was Gollum and it was My Precious and I swear if you had tried to take it I would have fought you off like an angry beast. I think I may have growled at a couple of people that tried to talk to me. I don't know. I was delirious.  But finally I got to my car and got home. Where I slept until right now.

Not really, I've been getting up everyday at 5:30 am to head into work with the sheepy. After which I sleep. I think I am better now. I think my wits have come back. I think I may not die from sheer exhaustion. I may die from something else though... I had a revelation today. An epiphany. A moment of utter amazement. Which is what I really wanted this blog to be about:


Now, for those of you that know me... I am indeed a Grinch, a real Scrooge when it comes to the big green and red holiday. To put it simply... I hate Christmas. It is just that Christmas comes with drama. Lots and lots of drama. You would think that it would make people calm and happy but it makes people stressed and anxious. This causes people to lash out. People compete over who gives the best presents. There are fights and bickering. It is all just too much for me to handle. In all actuality I don't really hate everything about Christmas. But this isn't a story about how I dislike Christmas. Like I said, it is a loving story of revelation and a new outlook on life. BUT just to get you up to speed here is a list of what I do hate:

Christmas music:  It's absolutely horrible. It is like nails on a chalk board to my ears. Every year I die a little when I have to listen to these horrid sounds. Not to mention they start playing it in early November. There are two songs I like... Carol of the Bells (instrumental version)... and The Twelve Days of Christmas (Muppet version). That's it. No others.

Christmas lights: They are bright. And they blind my eyes. And my family... is the Griswalds. I am not even kidding you. Right this very second my room is being lit up by the lights outside and my blinds are closed and my black shades are drawn and yet it still looks like my room is a disco ball. It's kind of obscene. All we need is to hook it up to some Christmas music and we can put on a choreographed light production in our front yard. And all I can think is oh my god... I don't even want to see the electric bill.

Christmas decorations: Really, I don't understand why we have to collect these little trinkets and store them in the attic just to get down for a few measly weeks. I do not think this is necessary. Then we have to put them away. I mean what is up with that!? I'm waaaaay too lazy to do this every year. So I don't. I have opted out of putting up decorations and lights since I was little. Much to the dislike of my Christmas adoring mother.

Christmas cookies: We make 8000 cookies every year. I am not kidding. It's what we do. We make a good 20 different kinds and 4 or 5 batches of each. This takes DAYS. After making them though, you'll never want to eat another cookie again in your life. That's the only good thing about it.

I am just hitting on the big things here... this doesn't even begin to comprise my hate list. But here is a list of things I greatly enjoy about the Christmas season.

Tamales and Taquitos on New Years Eve: This is a tradition for us. I love it. Even though I am not religious my family is and every year after Church we go eat these delicious things. We don't make them though. We're too white to make good Mexican tamales. I wouldn't dream of destroying these traditionally made delicious goodies with my Italian cooking ways.

Waking up on Christmas Morning: There is just something so magical about this. No drama. No craziness. Just my sister, my mom and my dad. And presents of course.

That is all I can think of... I am sure there must be more. Surely. Right?

Anyway, today after a long day of sheepy work and lunch with an old friend I decided that what I needed was wine and Lady Gaga. Two of my favorite things. So I poured a glass of Lime-a-Rita wine and sang loudly to Edge of Glory. That is when it happened. The revelation that is.

After about a glass of wine, this warm feeling started to come over me. I thought it was just the wine. But it wasn't. At least it didn't feel like wine induced warm feelings. It felt like Christmas feelings!! Is this what people feel when they talk about how they love Christmas and the holiday season? I can see the attraction to these warm gooey feelings of happiness. They started to build inside me and before I knew it I couldn't contain these Christmas feelings and that is when I turned around and saw my tree. Our beautiful fake Christmas tree. This is the first year we have had a fake one. We usually have a real one because my mom feels like it invokes the spirit of the holidays better. This year we convinced her that it was more logical and economical to just buy a fake one we can reuse. She was devastated but went along anyway... all the while chiming in how we have no holiday spirit. I am allergic to pine trees so a fake one was also more attractive to me in that way... but nobody seemed to care about that before. It always made my nose runny and me itchy. Bleh.

Anyway... back to the story. Wine. Lady Gaga. Warm fuzzy feelings. And there it was this glorious tree. 1200 LED lights shining back at me. Un-adorned with anything else. The ornaments were always mine and my sisters responsibility. But this year she isn't here and my mom said she would just do them herself because I so obviously didn't want to.

But here in this moment of fuzzy ooey-gooey feelings I made an executive Christmas decision to put on the ornaments. And so I did. All 600 of them. Give or take 10 or so. Then as I sat on the couch to look at my handy work... which looked pretty damn good if I do say so myself... the Lady Gaga song ended and my glass of wine came to empty. And as easily as it had come the warm feelings flew away and were replaced by a cold chilly breeze that usually settles in the part of your brain that controls Christmas feelings. And realized I was itchy and my nose was runny. Turns out I was never allergic to the pine tree. Just Christmas.

And so that is how I discovered the secret of Christmas. How all the adults actually get through this time of year. Wine... lots and lots of wine. I need to stock up. Bring it Christmas! You are getting owned this year.

Happy Half Birthday

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

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Today is my third favorite day of the year!! My first being Thanksgiving and my second being my birthday :) Though in reality, I don't actually celebrate my birthday big every year. I prefer a mellow day. And on the rare chance that I get a mellow day... I LOVE my birthday.

But do any of you know what today is? It is St. Nicholas day. BUT more importantly... it is my half birthday! These two occasions collide every year on December 6th and it is amazing. Usually I am smack in the middle of finals week. Which I currently am. Boo. Just 4 finals left though.

So officially today I am 21 and a half years of age. Which I can celebrate Thursday with my little sister (sorority related sister) who is in fact older than me. Almost everybody is older than me. It's something I have learned to accept and now that I am 21, I actually quite enjoy it because everybody will always be older. Which means when they are turning 40 I will still be in my 30s and kickin it!

On this momentous half birthday and St. Nicholas day I get my stocking. We don't do stockings on Christmas. We like to spread out our gift giving and start today. It is my favorite thing waking up and finding a stocking full of wonderful goodies. For those 3 years that I lived in the dorms and the sorority house and then a house with some friends, it was the saddest day not waking up and getting a stocking. But my mom always had one for us when we returned home for a visit. Now, this being my last year living in Cruces (hopefully), it is a bittersweet half birthday for me. My last actual stocking I will receive on this exact day in my own house. It really is sad.

 But for now I enjoy the gifts that I got: Gum (yumm), chap stick, a Christmas Moose (I love meeses. They are just so adorable!), sheep earrings (because I work with farm animals I tend to get gifts with farm animals on them. I love this. Even though I dislike actual sheep I enjoy accessories with sheep on them because they are just so cute. In real life... they are not cute. In real life the poop and they pee and they are dumber than any other animal I have ever come in contact with. Therefore, I enjoy these little mementos that make people have a skewed reality about how lovable sheep are. Without these cute little trinkets, people would undoubtedly hate sheep and I happen to like lamb and wool so I prefer this to not happen. Additionally, they will go excellent with my sheep high-top converse. Oh yeah. I have sheep converse.) And now that I am 21, I got champagne mixers. Oh how I love being 21 and have the holidays coming. Lots of delicious wine and champagne to be had!
 All I have to do is get through 3 more days of finals and I am home free. Then it is just a winter break filled with very early morning feeding/cleaning/sample taking... of you guessed it... SHEEP! But after those early mornings, I can sleep and read and have very long Supernatural marathons and enjoy my time off with the family and friends. 

I hope your St. Nicholas day is as magical as mine!! Though it probably won't be for most because I doubt it is your half birthday... though June 6th was a very popular day of birthing and I know at least 7 people who share it with me. Regardless, have a jolly good day and enjoy being alive and hopefully carefree (well as carefree as anybody can really be).

To my readers: I know some of you are thinking this is not as humorous as my usual blogs but I urge you to enjoy my light heartedness. It is a rare occasion. And as most of you know. I am, in fact, a Grinch and I very much dislike the revved up commercialized holiday of Christmas. This is about as jolly as I will be getting with the Christmas season currently being shoved down  my throat.

With that, a snow update: My school is delayed by 2 hours. Which does not help me in the slightest seeing as how I have a 2-4 hour OUTDOOR final at 1:30 this afternoon. Did I mention it is 18 degrees outside? No joke. I just looked at the thermometer. I live in Cruces. I do not own warm clothes. I have TWO long sleeve shirts... I just looked. The rest are short sleeved or 3/4. I am not sure that I will survive this weather. I literally have 1 warm jacket. And my scarves are for fashion not to provide heat. Help me!

10:57 AM - Yesterday

11:01 AM - Yesterday

1:00 PM - Yesterday

5:00 PM - Yesterday

6:00 PM - Yesterday

7:00 PM - Yesterday

8:00 AM - Today

Snow, Spiders, and Sapiens

Monday, December 5, 2011

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I know... at this very second I should be studying and going over my 800,000 note cards that I made but this is me taking a break. A very well deserved break I might add. This past weekend I spent about 28 hours studying. For once in my life, this is actually not an overestimate. This is legitimate fact. I don't know if you are aware... but there are only 48 hours in two days. 28 of which I spent studying. 16 of which I spent sleeping. 4 of which I spent driving to and from the library, eating, and taking little breaks.

Funny... that's exactly what I looked like at the lib.

I started with close to 12 hours at the library on Saturday with my friend Val. I was insanely productive that day. And then... it all went down hill from there. Towards the end of the day, I was attacked by a spider. A spider that crawled on my ear, down my neck and into my shirt. I then proceeded to have a very public freak out about this spider. For the next thirty minutes I proceeded to believe this spider was attacking me. I felt like Ron from Harry Potter. I now fully understand his hatred and fear towards spiders. My episode was so similar to his I felt as if I was in the movie/book. For those of you who have ever read or watched Harry Potter you know exactly what I am talking about. And I assure you my situation was the exact same. Except switch out hundreds of gigantic spiders looking to eat you for one small tiny spider probably the a quarter of the size of my pinky nail who I probably ended up squishing in my panic attack. Besides that... I'm sure you can see the resemblances of the situations.

Once I was attacked by this spider, I couldn't get it out of my head and we decided to call it quits that day. I promptly headed home, passed out, woke up and went straight back to the library on Sunday morning. I find I am more productive at the library. I usually do not tend to get as distracted. I don't feel the need to check facebook every 2 minutes. I don't have to spend hours looking at pictures on pinterest. There is nothing else I can do besides study. But when I am at my house, I have dogs, and tv, and cleaning to do. SO much cleaning... Have you ever noticed how when you need to do things you "suddenly" see just how dirty your house and surroundings are. And it is imperative that you clean EVERYTHING that very second... because without doing that you're homework is inexplicably going to get swallowed up into the mess of your surroundings and lost forever and how will you ever be able to study then!?! It's a logical, rational way of thinking about things.

But you don't have to worry about that when you are at the library. So off to the library I went Sunday morning. However, after being there for 5 hours I could no longer feel my feet or my fingers. I was pretty positive the second ice age had officially hit. And had I had a runny nose, it would have frozen into icicles. That is exactly how cold it was. I don't know about you but I am not an effective thinker when my brain is frozen solid and the nerves are short circuiting because they were not made to function in -55 degree weather and therefore can no longer send messages to the rest of my body. This was when Val said she was leaving and I took it as my cue to head home too and study there. Of course, when I got home it took me a full hour to get back into the swing of things. But eventually I went full force only to stop and eat dinner where I then went to sleep again.

This morning I woke up at 4:45 to re-read my notes. This is when I do some of my best studying. I HAVE to study right before a test to make sure everything is solidified and exactly where I want it to be. Without this... I will fail. Then I went and took my first final. After which, I was told I could miss 55 points and get an A in the class... that means I could get a 45 on the test and get an A. I studied for TWO days for this test when all I had to get was a 45!??? I went through an ice age and a spider attack for this! This would have been valuable information to know ahead of time. Obviously, I would still have studied and I would still have aimed for a high grade. I just would have allocated some of my time to my other four tests that I still have to take this week.

Now, I have two major tests left and two tests that are slightly less important. One test of which my teacher was smart enough to inform me ahead of time that I only need a 65 on the final. Which means... I will be studying for evolution for the next two days.

All of this is really hard to do when it is snowing outside. A form of weather that is hardly ever witnessed in the city of Las Cruces. So much so that I have a good 200 facebook updates in my home page about how it is snowing! This also happens when it rains. Precipitation in general tends to freak people here out. We drive slower, we try to leave the house less, and we generally sit at a window and stare outside for hours at the wonderful creation of water falling from the sky. You can only imagine how all of this water and staring is impeding on my studying.

This is my backyard... it isn't cold enough for the snow to stick to the concrete :(
BUT it is stil snowing so who knows.
Updated SNOW pictures!

Alas, I must tend to the radiation of Homo eructus out of Africa and into Europe and Asia which led to... you guessed it... MORE evolution and here I am a modern day Homo sapien. I blame them for my having to study for the horribly dreadful class of evolution. I'd be fine sitting around a fire in my cave eating the lion I just killed with my hand made spear. But nope... we just had to evolve.

The Towing of Coup

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

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Yesterday, I had my car towed. Towed away to a land filled with other misfit cars. At least my car wasn't lonely. But I can only imagine how scared Coup was. That's my car's name... Coup. He looks like a Coup. He'd be very embarrassed if I put a picture of him up though, due to the fact that he is indeed fading... and broken. He asked me to keep his anonymity while writing this blog.

The only thing good about Coup being towed was he wasn't stolen! I thought he was stolen. I freaked out. I almost cried. I couldn't breathe. And what was I thinking about if my car had been stolen... how ALL of my notes were in my backpack in his trunk and finals are next week. Next thought, my Jennifer Lopez coat was in there too. The second part almost made me crawl up on the ground and cry. Don't tell Coup I was less worried about his safety. He will be heart broken!

In my maniacal freaking out, my friend had the good sense to call her management company (I was parked at her apartment) to see if they knew anything. Turns out... they had Coup towed!! I have been parking at her apartment for years. YEARS! Where do they want me to park when I am visiting her? There is virtually no other parking for blocks and there is no street parking. I guess from now on I will have to take my magical carpet and fly in to visit her. What the heck is this?

Apparently, there is a sign that says you can't park there during school hours because they don't want students who are going to campus to park there and not on campus. I am not one of these delinquent kids who evades the parking system by stealing parking from honest apartment owners. No. I only park there when I visit her. And on this particular day, I was visiting in a time of turmoil and was being a good friend. What do I get for being a good friend!? Coup gets towed. Not that I would not have visited her either way. Of course I would console her in her time of need. She is my awkward best friend that I have known since freshman year when I yelled at her for not speaking. I will have to tell you about the story of how we met. It really is quite fascinating that we are friends. But we are. And I heart her.

Ok out of the mushy friend business and back into the reason for this blog... the towing of my vehicle. So here I am at 4 pm... mind you the towing company closes at 5 pm. So the apartment management says they had my car towed. So I call the towing company... they tell me that it is going to cost $250 to get Coup back... and they only take cash. OK! Because obviously I just have hundreds of dollars just floating around my wallet. Let me just whip out those bills for you. Get freakin real. I am poor and I hate carrying cash. And I am flustered. Can you even imagine the embarrassment Coup must have felt as he was shamefully attached to another truck and brutally kidnapped... hauled through town... and locked away.

And, Coup probably isn't even worth the 250 buckaroos I am shelling out to release him from car jail. I am not even kidding you. He is a 10 year old pile of faded blue paint and broken insides. He gets horrible mileage and doesn't even offer cooling on those hot summer days. Additionally, he always gets hit or dented or people break into him. It's probably because he looks like a cholo gangster should be driving him and bumping the bass. You know what I am talking about. One of those super low cars playing their music so loud that it shakes all the other cars next to it. While the driver has his window down and one heavily tattooed arm hanging precariously out of the window. Yeah, that's what Coup reminds people of. Once again please refrain from telling Coup this. I'm pretty sure I would wake up tomorrow morning to find that he had ran away to a place where people appreciated him... probably a scrap yard. But in loyalty... and more for the fact that I have to get around... I paid the $250 dollars to get him back.

So now we have to trek it to the bank and head to the towing company... literally in the middle of freaking nowhere. Finally, we get there with the much needed help of Google Maps. As I hand over my wad of 20 dollar bills, the guy has to get change out form his own wallet. First off, what kind of legit company doesn't take credit. Also what kind of legit company doesn't take credit when they require so much money from you. Conclusion... the management at my friend's apartment hired a very sketchy, not even close to legit towing company that is currently stealing my money and there is nothing I can do about it!!

Then, he tells a younger guy to go fetch my car. I say I have my keys. The owner of the towing company looks at me as if he has never heard such words spoken in his presence before. "You have your keys!!??" Uhh... duh! It's my car! How in the world did you think I was going to pick it up and drive it home. What? Was I going to push it the 15 miles back to my house by hand. Are you dumb? Because I am thinking you are dumb sir. I am also thinking this doesn't lend well to your credibility as a legit service to the people of this city.

So, after much turmoil and a heavy hit to my wallet, Coup is back in my presence. He's slightly shaken and is currently upset with me that I would let such a horrible thing happen to him. I think he deserves a nice run through the car wash soon! That'll make him happy.

The Awesome Idea Factory

Monday, November 28, 2011

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Today, I started the last week of classes for this semester. I know, I could almost die with the excitement I am feeling about this! Notice the word "almost." I could almost die with excitement... if it weren't for the week of finals starting one week from today. I could almost die with excitement... if it weren't for my teachers having cumulative finals. I could almost die with excitement... if you didn't give me an entire week off and then expect me to come back with some magical burst of enthusiasm for just two weeks. See, it's a pretty darn big ALMOST. I guess I have to wait exactly 10 days for the real excitement to kick in.

I think the key to cutting out the almost would be ending school before Thanksgiving break. Sound like a good idea to you? Because it sounds like an EXCELLENT idea for me. I would much rather start school two whole weeks earlier if it meant that I got off from Thanksgiving to January. That would just be beyond spectacular. I know, I am lucky with the 6 week break that NMSU is already giving us but 8 just sounds like a better number.

It turns out... 8 IS a better number and let me tell you why. Apparently, the Chinese consider 8 a lucky number because it sounds like the word prosper in the Chinese language. Additionally, numerologists believe that the number 8 stands for business, success, and wealth. I don't know about you guys, but most of us college students tend to actually go to college because we want to get a good job, be successful, and make money. 8 also represents a type of momentum that comes from repetition of cycles. Isn't that what every semester is... repetition... over and over and over? A never ending cycle! I think I am making an excellent case as to why we should have an 8 week break. Really, I think I just solved all of the world's problems by simply evoking the enchanting powers of the number 8. Then we could stop all this Occupy nonsense and actually boost the economy (business), get more kids to graduate and actually get employed (successful), while all the while making money for ourselves and the economy (wealth). Just cut out this 2 week stretch and give our growing college student minds a chance to breathe a little. Uhh... does anybody else think this is the best idea ever? People should really pay me to come up with these brilliant ideas.

Unfortunately, I have not received a call about employment opportunities at the Awesome Idea factory... even though I'm at least a 51% share holder. So for now, I will hopelessly stare at the phone awaiting the call.

All the while... I will be destroying 85 trees. I did the math. It's at least 85. With all the notes, books, tests, and other paper material I print out on a daily basis, I am destroying trees. Lots and lots and lots of trees. Even though I can recycle this... recycling paper can only be done 3 times before the paper fragments shorten too much to be used again. So great. I am a mass tree killer. I feel so good about myself.

Just today I bought 500 note cards. 500!! I am not a person to study for tests on note cards... I just never really have done it before. But while in class, I somehow got the idea that since I have so many cumulative tests this year I should make note cards. Note cards were never really necessary because most of my teachers were kind, generous and smart and said that our final was only over the last section of notes taken after the previous tests. This year, my teachers are cold and conniving and all decided to meet up at their secret teacher convention that must have come to town. Turns out, the topic this year was cumulative test taking! I can only imagine what the key note speaker must have said.

"It's only 25 chapters PER class... and they only have FIVE finals in a row to take. That's only a total of 125 chapters at oh lets estimate only 3000 pages of material. That's nothing!!"

This was obviously received with thousands of screaming cheers from faculty all across the world... and thus it was decided that cumulative test taking was in this year.

I usually get away with only 1 or 2 cumulative finals but not this year. I bless the two teachers that decided to not have a final at all. Because I really couldn't take another several hundred pages of material to shove in my brain. It's already eroding at a rapid pace. I found myself sitting in evolution today talking about primates and how humans evolved and our brain size and next thing I know I was thinking about the brain I dissected in zoology. Which led to lack of brain in the sheep I judge/clean/work with. Which then led me to that persuasive speech I gave in seminar. Which made me think about how I only have 1 day left in communications which made me giddy and I started giggling and the evolution teacher scowled at me. See... it's already affecting my mental state. Giggling in the middle of an evolution lecture when the rest of the class is silent and you are staring off into nothing... makes you look a little bit like a crazy delusional mad hatter.

Therefore, this all led to the conclusion of making note cards... of which I have already reached close to 200 and I am only on one class. I am going to need to make another stop at the store this week. I probably have been avoiding this note card taking to ultimately avoid the many many trees I am inevitably killing...

And to think, had we only had off right after Thanksgiving, the teachers would have been happy and would have not felt the need to attend the crazy teacher convention. They then would have only had finals from the last section of course work and I would not be killing 85 trees.

All of this from my conclusions on the number 8. I know... awesome.

You are welcome.

Shopping Remorse

Sunday, November 27, 2011

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I have a shopping problem. It's really more like I am a bi-polar shopper. This is because I LOVE to get new things but I HATE spending money. I am one of those people I would rather spend money on a good restaurant, a play, a vacation, or a show.

I love clothes... but I hate buying them and I am very frugal with my money... but not all the time. There are those few moments in a year when I just have to buy things. It's like I can't help myself. One of these days is Black Friday. I really don't need anything and this is what I told myself when I set out to go shopping with my mom on Black Friday. This used to be a big thing in our family. My sister, my mom, (sometimes my grandma and aunt if they were in town) would wake up at 3 in the morning and head to El Paso to go to Kohl's. Then we would get a Starbucks and a Burger King Breakfast, maybe go to the outlet mall and then make the 45 minute trip back to Las Cruces. Once we got older we extended the shopping enough to so we could go have lunch at PF Chang's because we don't have one in LC and it is so deliciously amazing.

However, the last couple of years I opted out of the early morning shopping because quite frankly I valued my sleep way more then I will ever value a new computer, new shoes, or a new shirt. Sleep is very important to me. I can run on little sleep and I have done this for months at a time but if I can avoid it, I would like to. I can sleep any time, any where, and in any amounts of sunlight... though I much prefer a very dark cave like atmosphere which is why I have black curtains in my room and hardly ever open the blinds. So you can see, shopping is just not as high up on my list as sleeping. As a matter of fact I sleep so much that when I was little, I fell asleep at a wedding and my parents didn't want to leave so they put me on my Dad's jacket and shoved me under the present table where I slept, without waking, for the entire wedding. Awesome. I have also been known to reflexively take swings at my roommates when they would wake me up so they had to take to throwing pillows at me instead. But I think you get the picture. Shopping = stealing sleep... therefore I hate shopping.

Since my sister is gone to Pennsylvania, my mom was going to go shopping by herself... which I could just not allow. So we woke up when we woke up which for me is never much later than 8 and had our coffee and strolled out the door at a comfortable 10 am instead of the usual 3 am. This kind of shopping I could get used to.

As I mentioned above, I told myself I didn't really need anything. So how is it that I left Kohl's that morning spending ungodly amounts of money on 3 shirts, 1 jacket, earrings, a necklace, throw pillows... yes. throw pillows. a cupcake maker and a recipe book (an Xmas gift I bought myself from my sister). Three huge scarves. A big thing of 40 different shades of eye shadow.

Thank you Zoo York

A beautiful white watch that I am determined to wear. I am notorious for getting watches... wearing them for a couple weeks and never touching them again. But this one is amazing. It is digital AND analog. It's also a men's watch because lets face it, women's watches are ugly. I don't want diamonds or jewels or tiny little bands that look all dainty. Get real. I like something with substance. Something that I don't need to squint my eyes to see. Something that also tells me the date in big bold letters since I often have to ask multiple times a day. A women's watch just cannot do this. And if it does, it's purple or pink or something horrible.

I got to say I love Jennifer Lopez's new line at Kohl's. I also have her coat from there. Too bad it never gets cold enough here to wear it.

I also scored a black J-Lo clutch/wallet/small purse, sunglasses and some other little things. But even on this shopping spree... I'm pretty frugal. I pretty much refuse to spend over $25 on any clothing item EVER unless it is a jacket or a purse. Anything else I will most definitely pass it by until it goes on sale or I just live without it.

But lets truly think about this. Do I need 40 different shades of eye shadow... No. Do I really need another necklace or more earrings... No. I don't actually need any of this. But it is all so pretty! And any other time of the year I would get home feeling intense buyers remorse because that is just the kind of person I am. But good deals on Black Friday make me feel not so bad.

This would have been enough. But we proceed to go to the Helen of Troy Outlet where I was simply going to buy a hair dryer because mine is about to explode and often sucks my hair in the back and lights it on fire. Seeing as how a burning head of hair is not really a good thing, I rationalized my need to buy a hair dryer. But do you really think I left with just a hair dryer? Absolutely not. It started off with a gift set on sale with some brushes and a curling iron (also something I need). Then I saw a packaged set of a Revlon hairdryer WITH a flat iron AND another curling iron. I mean, can you honestly pass that up!? No, I think not.  But that isn't all. I had to buy the world's smallest flat iron I have ever seen. But to get that you had to buy all the other stuff that came with it. But it is the coolest flat iron ever. It is barely just bigger than my hand.

After also scooping up some OXO kitchen utensils we decided we were good and checked out where... ironically... we got a free hairdryer. The only thing I came in to buy... and they hand me a second one free. What the heck? I just spent all this money and now I have TWO hair dryers TWO flat irons and TWO curling irons. What am I supposed to do with all of this stuff? Looks like somebody is getting a hair dryer for Xmas. Speaking of... I just noticed I did not get a single thing for anybody else for Christmas. I am such a horrible shopper.

But here I am two days after Black Friday returning to my old ways of not spending money on certain items. My mom just showed me a picture of a digital camera. Something that I have been needing for a very long time because I have had mine since 2004. It's a beast. It also takes horrible pictures. But she came in excited about a camera that maybe she can buy me and it is on sale for $225... absolutely not mother. I am not letting anybody buy me a $225 camera. Get real. Do you know how many other things I can buy with that money. A lot. Even $125 is pretty steep for me.

Thus the bi-polar money spending ways continues from one big sale to the next. And I just spent all my money on this stuff and grad applications and I am not quite sure how I am going to manage to buy all the gifts I need for people for Xmas.

Attack of the Bubble Gum Fairy

Friday, November 18, 2011

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This is a story of how I met this girl in class. I didn't so much as meet her as I did observe her... and I didn't really observe her on purpose. More like she was screaming at me without ever actually opening her mouth and you can't just ignore a person who is screaming at you like that. Do you understand how big of a feat that is... screaming with your mouth shut!? It's quite impressive actually.

So there I was, sitting in class listening to a guest lecturer. We were about 15 minutes in when in strolls this girl. And though I fully believe in the invisible seating charts, when you have a class of 300 students the seating chart goes out the window and you have seating chaos. It's like anarchy. I don't think I have ever sat in the same seat twice... ever.

Once again... in comes this girl and there is an available seat next to me. There are also several other available seats that are more highly attainable but nope she goes for the one next to me. I am sitting smack in the center of this gigantic lecture hall. Therefore, in order for her to make it to me she passes three open seats and crawls over like 10 kids laps to get there. This causes a large amount of confusion and noise and staring from the class.

Now, let me explain this girl to you. She's petite and cute and blond and... pink. Now, I don't have anything against the color pink. As a matter of fact, I actually like the color pink... but if you were to spread the amount of pink she had on over 10 people, each of those 10 people would still be wearing too much pink! She had pink eye shadow, pink nails, pink shirt, pink shoe laces, a pink backpack, and a pink ribbon in her hair. You would think it was October and we were in the middle of the Pink Game... but in case you haven't caught up it's November.

She kind of looked like this

So now I don't even know what we are talking about in class... something about politics and communication and some kind of theory and we are all conformers. Let me tell you... this girl is not a conformer in the least. And yeah maybe I am not the best judge of character because here I am sitting in black jeans, dark gray knee high boots, a white tank with a black flowing sweater thing, large black earrings, a black ring, and a necklace with artsy keys dangling from it. Obviously not the day I decide to express the full range of the color wheel... apparently neither did this girl.

I try my hardest to get back to the lecture and continue taking notes when this girl pulls out her laptop to take notes on... a PINK laptop with a PINK toolbar and a PINK background. It's like somebody popped a gigantic bubble of bubble gum all over her or she decided to take a bath in Pepto-Bismol this morning. This is when I start to look around... does anybody else see this girl? Really, I must be imagining this. I had to resist the urge to touch her to see if she was real. It was like the Bubble Gum Barbie was visiting me in the middle of communications. Maybe she had some secret message to tell me. Maybe this was all a test. Or maybe she is like my own personal Fairy God Mother and is here to grant my wishes so I can get to the ball on time. I don't know, but it's all so surreal.

Finally, I make myself get back to the class where we are talking about the spiral theory or something of the sort. And the guest lecturer notices we are all furiously writing as fast as we can. He stops to tell us that these notes will be made available to us online this weekend so we can use them to study. I still manage to get almost everything on all the slides but the Bubble Gum Barbie next to me cannot seem to type as fast as I can write... which is odd because I generally type 10X faster. But every time the lecturer goes to the next slide she makes this loud exasperated sigh. Like she is going to fail the class if she didn't get that last line of notes... which will be online.

This is when I silently chastise myself. "Kaitlyn, you are sooooo mean! You are judging your secret Fairy God Mother/Bubble Gum Barbie. Do you really think she is going to grant you any wishes? Obviously she has the ability to read your thoughts because it comes with the job description. Stop it right now Kaitlyn!"

So in a rush to make up for this I nudge her a little and face my notebook towards her so she can catch up on the notes. I continue this all throughout class. Then, when we are just wrapping up class she reaches into her pink magical back pack and pulls out two Dum Dums... pink cotton candy flavored of course and hands them to me. Next thing I know the lecturer calls the class and a rush of 300 students get up to leave and just like that I have lost her. Swept away in the crowd never to be seen from again.

Best Bubble Gum Fairy ever? I think so.

The Fear of Cotton Balls

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

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Several people have told me that I need to speak out about my irrational fear of cotton balls, polar fleece... and anything fluffy and fuzzy.

There is an actual name for this fear. One is called textophobia which is the fear of certain fabrics. There is a cooler name too but I can't find it! So I may have made it up at one point in time. I think it started with an "H."
This fear started long ago as early as infancy. Apparently, I did not like to be put in those cute children pajamas because of all the fluffyness going on. In my head, I picture me as a little baby sitting there and freaking out and crying and just generally hating life. I kind of imagine myself to look like that kid over there. -->

People don't understand this fear. It's normal to not understand things you can't fully feel. But let me tell you. Cotton balls/polar fleece are the scariest things I have ever encountered. You can literally hear the fabric rubbing against each other. It's so horrible. It sounds like nails on a chalk board magnified 800 times directly in my ear drum.

This irrational fear led to my sister rubbing her hands on the top of the car roof. I think this made my ears bleed sometimes. And my roommate chasing me with her blanket around the house until I finally locked myself in my room because she wouldn't stop. This was her tool for when she was mad at me... or bored. Because apparently I am very entertaining when I get like this. One day she caught me under the blanket while I was on the couch. I was paralyzed! It was the worst feeling you could possibly imagine. I'm pretty sure I would rather walk barefoot over broken glass than have somebody put a polar fleece jacket on me. Not okay.

So growing up I could never wear all those fuzzy amazing things that people like to start wearing when it gets cold out.

 But the most tragic thing that this phobia has caused is not being able to wear this... 

Which really makes me a sad person because could you imagine how warm this would be when you went camping!? Except, as it has been pointed out to me you could get shot because somebody mistook you for a bear. But if you just lay on the ground and don't run around growling all crazy like I feel this would be ok.

This is enough for me to start considering getting over this fear... and then I see a cotton ball and once again I am instantly petrified. If not even an amazingly awesome bear sleeping bag could get rid of this fear, I am pretty sure nothing can. I am doomed to forever walk in this world in a state of constant cold because I won't put on a damn fluffy jacket!
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