"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

Attack of the Bubble Gum Fairy

Friday, November 18, 2011

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This is a story of how I met this girl in class. I didn't so much as meet her as I did observe her... and I didn't really observe her on purpose. More like she was screaming at me without ever actually opening her mouth and you can't just ignore a person who is screaming at you like that. Do you understand how big of a feat that is... screaming with your mouth shut!? It's quite impressive actually.

So there I was, sitting in class listening to a guest lecturer. We were about 15 minutes in when in strolls this girl. And though I fully believe in the invisible seating charts, when you have a class of 300 students the seating chart goes out the window and you have seating chaos. It's like anarchy. I don't think I have ever sat in the same seat twice... ever.

Once again... in comes this girl and there is an available seat next to me. There are also several other available seats that are more highly attainable but nope she goes for the one next to me. I am sitting smack in the center of this gigantic lecture hall. Therefore, in order for her to make it to me she passes three open seats and crawls over like 10 kids laps to get there. This causes a large amount of confusion and noise and staring from the class.

Now, let me explain this girl to you. She's petite and cute and blond and... pink. Now, I don't have anything against the color pink. As a matter of fact, I actually like the color pink... but if you were to spread the amount of pink she had on over 10 people, each of those 10 people would still be wearing too much pink! She had pink eye shadow, pink nails, pink shirt, pink shoe laces, a pink backpack, and a pink ribbon in her hair. You would think it was October and we were in the middle of the Pink Game... but in case you haven't caught up it's November.

She kind of looked like this

So now I don't even know what we are talking about in class... something about politics and communication and some kind of theory and we are all conformers. Let me tell you... this girl is not a conformer in the least. And yeah maybe I am not the best judge of character because here I am sitting in black jeans, dark gray knee high boots, a white tank with a black flowing sweater thing, large black earrings, a black ring, and a necklace with artsy keys dangling from it. Obviously not the day I decide to express the full range of the color wheel... apparently neither did this girl.

I try my hardest to get back to the lecture and continue taking notes when this girl pulls out her laptop to take notes on... a PINK laptop with a PINK toolbar and a PINK background. It's like somebody popped a gigantic bubble of bubble gum all over her or she decided to take a bath in Pepto-Bismol this morning. This is when I start to look around... does anybody else see this girl? Really, I must be imagining this. I had to resist the urge to touch her to see if she was real. It was like the Bubble Gum Barbie was visiting me in the middle of communications. Maybe she had some secret message to tell me. Maybe this was all a test. Or maybe she is like my own personal Fairy God Mother and is here to grant my wishes so I can get to the ball on time. I don't know, but it's all so surreal.

Finally, I make myself get back to the class where we are talking about the spiral theory or something of the sort. And the guest lecturer notices we are all furiously writing as fast as we can. He stops to tell us that these notes will be made available to us online this weekend so we can use them to study. I still manage to get almost everything on all the slides but the Bubble Gum Barbie next to me cannot seem to type as fast as I can write... which is odd because I generally type 10X faster. But every time the lecturer goes to the next slide she makes this loud exasperated sigh. Like she is going to fail the class if she didn't get that last line of notes... which will be online.

This is when I silently chastise myself. "Kaitlyn, you are sooooo mean! You are judging your secret Fairy God Mother/Bubble Gum Barbie. Do you really think she is going to grant you any wishes? Obviously she has the ability to read your thoughts because it comes with the job description. Stop it right now Kaitlyn!"

So in a rush to make up for this I nudge her a little and face my notebook towards her so she can catch up on the notes. I continue this all throughout class. Then, when we are just wrapping up class she reaches into her pink magical back pack and pulls out two Dum Dums... pink cotton candy flavored of course and hands them to me. Next thing I know the lecturer calls the class and a rush of 300 students get up to leave and just like that I have lost her. Swept away in the crowd never to be seen from again.

Best Bubble Gum Fairy ever? I think so.