People told me for a while that I was aiming too high for my plans in life. To these people I said: F You! Really, who honestly says that to another human being? I don't care if you are thinking it. But you sure don't say it.
I was blasted for months about this. But me, being an idiot, thought to myself: I have worked insanely hard for YEARS. I had jobs that were supposed to get me places. I networked with people. I did good in my classes. I sacrificed a lot of time with friends and I blew off relationships with people because I knew my future was important. I knew I was going places. Much bigger than I could accomplish in this town. I put happiness aside at times for things that I thought would make me happy in the future.
Turns out, those people were right. After all of that hard work I have absolutely nothing to show for it. I feel like I have wasted the past 11 years of my life. I could have been doing something I love. I could have been caring less and have been happy and had fun. I could have been baking and cooking and drinking wine but instead I chose this path.
Why? Because I had these preconceived notions that if you are an incredibly hard worker and you do things that are aimed to push you to a good future you are going to get some place with your life. Nope. Not true people! Life doesn't work like this.
Life couldn't give a crap about hard work. It's all about politics and name brands and money. It really is quite horrible.
Sorry for the Debby Downer talk over here. I thought 2 hours at the gym would alleviate my anger and stress but it hasn't. I'm just angry at the whole world right now including myself. To top it off, I am very very sore.
So... here I am, currently waiting for bad thing number 3 to happen. And then the universe will be like:
Oh. Hey Kaitlyn. I really couldn't help but notice your life is going down the toilet. I mean really, I tried not to notice but hey I just couldn't resist watching. It's like a train wreck. You know something bad is coming but you just can't seem to take your eyes off of it. Here is one thing that I thought would cheer you up!
And then the universe will hand me a half melted ice cream cone and be on its way planning for another set of 3 really bad things.
I PROMISE I won't be this mopey and whiny again. It's annoying. I'm starting to get annoyed with myself too. I need to start packing bags for my future in Italy anyway. That is a much more productive use of my time.
On the most happy of things... because really, all I have to look forward to is alcohol - I am starting a new weekly post entitled A Day at the Vineyard where I shall chat about my adventures in wine tasting and maybe you can pick up a few winerific tips along the way.
|This is some good advice right here|