"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

The Towing of Coup

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

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Yesterday, I had my car towed. Towed away to a land filled with other misfit cars. At least my car wasn't lonely. But I can only imagine how scared Coup was. That's my car's name... Coup. He looks like a Coup. He'd be very embarrassed if I put a picture of him up though, due to the fact that he is indeed fading... and broken. He asked me to keep his anonymity while writing this blog.

The only thing good about Coup being towed was he wasn't stolen! I thought he was stolen. I freaked out. I almost cried. I couldn't breathe. And what was I thinking about if my car had been stolen... how ALL of my notes were in my backpack in his trunk and finals are next week. Next thought, my Jennifer Lopez coat was in there too. The second part almost made me crawl up on the ground and cry. Don't tell Coup I was less worried about his safety. He will be heart broken!

In my maniacal freaking out, my friend had the good sense to call her management company (I was parked at her apartment) to see if they knew anything. Turns out... they had Coup towed!! I have been parking at her apartment for years. YEARS! Where do they want me to park when I am visiting her? There is virtually no other parking for blocks and there is no street parking. I guess from now on I will have to take my magical carpet and fly in to visit her. What the heck is this?

Apparently, there is a sign that says you can't park there during school hours because they don't want students who are going to campus to park there and not on campus. I am not one of these delinquent kids who evades the parking system by stealing parking from honest apartment owners. No. I only park there when I visit her. And on this particular day, I was visiting in a time of turmoil and was being a good friend. What do I get for being a good friend!? Coup gets towed. Not that I would not have visited her either way. Of course I would console her in her time of need. She is my awkward best friend that I have known since freshman year when I yelled at her for not speaking. I will have to tell you about the story of how we met. It really is quite fascinating that we are friends. But we are. And I heart her.

Ok out of the mushy friend business and back into the reason for this blog... the towing of my vehicle. So here I am at 4 pm... mind you the towing company closes at 5 pm. So the apartment management says they had my car towed. So I call the towing company... they tell me that it is going to cost $250 to get Coup back... and they only take cash. OK! Because obviously I just have hundreds of dollars just floating around my wallet. Let me just whip out those bills for you. Get freakin real. I am poor and I hate carrying cash. And I am flustered. Can you even imagine the embarrassment Coup must have felt as he was shamefully attached to another truck and brutally kidnapped... hauled through town... and locked away.

And, Coup probably isn't even worth the 250 buckaroos I am shelling out to release him from car jail. I am not even kidding you. He is a 10 year old pile of faded blue paint and broken insides. He gets horrible mileage and doesn't even offer cooling on those hot summer days. Additionally, he always gets hit or dented or people break into him. It's probably because he looks like a cholo gangster should be driving him and bumping the bass. You know what I am talking about. One of those super low cars playing their music so loud that it shakes all the other cars next to it. While the driver has his window down and one heavily tattooed arm hanging precariously out of the window. Yeah, that's what Coup reminds people of. Once again please refrain from telling Coup this. I'm pretty sure I would wake up tomorrow morning to find that he had ran away to a place where people appreciated him... probably a scrap yard. But in loyalty... and more for the fact that I have to get around... I paid the $250 dollars to get him back.

So now we have to trek it to the bank and head to the towing company... literally in the middle of freaking nowhere. Finally, we get there with the much needed help of Google Maps. As I hand over my wad of 20 dollar bills, the guy has to get change out form his own wallet. First off, what kind of legit company doesn't take credit. Also what kind of legit company doesn't take credit when they require so much money from you. Conclusion... the management at my friend's apartment hired a very sketchy, not even close to legit towing company that is currently stealing my money and there is nothing I can do about it!!

Then, he tells a younger guy to go fetch my car. I say I have my keys. The owner of the towing company looks at me as if he has never heard such words spoken in his presence before. "You have your keys!!??" Uhh... duh! It's my car! How in the world did you think I was going to pick it up and drive it home. What? Was I going to push it the 15 miles back to my house by hand. Are you dumb? Because I am thinking you are dumb sir. I am also thinking this doesn't lend well to your credibility as a legit service to the people of this city.

So, after much turmoil and a heavy hit to my wallet, Coup is back in my presence. He's slightly shaken and is currently upset with me that I would let such a horrible thing happen to him. I think he deserves a nice run through the car wash soon! That'll make him happy.