"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

A Half Melted Ice Cream Cone

Monday, January 30, 2012

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I am a firm believer that bad things happen in threes. So far, 2 incredibly bad things happened today. I guess not incredibly bad. Just, you know, the route of my future that I had planned for myself is currently in a state of warfare and I am losing. Badly.

People told me for a while that I was aiming too high for my plans in life. To these people I said: F You! Really, who honestly says that to another human being? I don't care if you are thinking it. But you sure don't say it.

I was blasted for months about this. But me, being an idiot, thought to myself: I have worked insanely hard for YEARS. I had jobs that were supposed to get me places. I networked with people. I did good in my classes. I sacrificed a lot of time with friends and I blew off relationships with people because I knew my future was important. I knew I was going places. Much bigger than I could accomplish in this town. I put happiness aside at times for things that I thought would make me happy in the future.

Turns out, those people were right. After all of that hard work I have absolutely nothing to show for it. I feel like I have wasted the past 11 years of my life. I could have been doing something I love. I could have been caring less and have been happy and had fun. I could have been baking and cooking and drinking wine but instead I chose this path.

Why? Because I had these preconceived notions that if you are an incredibly hard worker and you do things that are aimed to push you to a good future you are going to get some place with your life. Nope. Not true people! Life doesn't work like this.

Life couldn't give a crap about hard work. It's all about politics and name brands and money. It really is quite horrible.

Sorry for the Debby Downer talk over here. I thought 2 hours at the gym would alleviate my anger and stress but it hasn't. I'm just angry at the whole world right now including myself. To top it off, I am very very sore.

So... here I am, currently waiting for bad thing number 3 to happen. And then the universe will be like:

Oh. Hey Kaitlyn. I really couldn't help but notice your life is going down the toilet. I mean really, I tried not to notice but hey I just couldn't resist watching. It's like a train wreck. You know something bad is coming but you just can't seem to take your eyes off of it. Here is one thing that I thought would cheer you up!

And then the universe will hand me a half melted ice cream cone and be on its way planning for another set of 3 really bad things.

I PROMISE I won't be this mopey and whiny again. It's annoying. I'm starting to get annoyed with myself too. I need to start packing bags for my future in Italy anyway. That is a much more productive use of my time.

On the most happy of things... because really, all I have to look forward to is alcohol - I am starting a new weekly post entitled A Day at the Vineyard where I shall chat about my adventures in wine tasting and maybe you can pick up a few winerific tips along the way.

This is some good advice right here

...Life doesn't have to suck. Be happy. Be happy now. Not later. This I have learned first hand... and take frequent naps. It makes for a better outlook on your currently sucky life!

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