"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

I am not a Wallace

Thursday, October 27, 2011

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University of Wisconsin (dircollege.com)... not NMSU. Our lecture halls don't look this fancy :(
I know there isn't assigned seating in college but there is the unspoken rule of calling seats. It is a natural thing that just kind of happens. After about the first week or two of classes, people sit in the same seat pretty much the rest of the semester. You just walk into the classroom and gravitate to that one seat. You sit next to the same people and the teachers get used to seeing you there. It just happens.

Though a good trick if you miss a lot of class is to never sit in the same seat twice and always move around the room because the teacher is less likely to notice when you aren't there... or so I've heard. Because I certainly have never tried this! I don't condone this type of behavior.

Anyway, so about a couple weeks into school you have your "seat." And you start to feel really good about this seat. It's a known fact that people don't sit in your seat and you do not sit in theirs. I'm pretty sure this is considered the 5th law of physics... it just happens. And sometimes there are those stragglers who only show up on test days and sit in your seat because how in the world are they supposed to know that it is your seat? It's not like they ever actually come to class. So you forgive those few instances.

In evolution, I have the perfect seat! It's on the edge of class, an isle seat, and faces perfectly to the screen so I can see the board and isn't far enough back that I have to put my glasses on.

There is this kid that sits two rows directly in back of me every day. I don't know his name but we do the polite nod to each other anytime we come in to class and sometimes I see him around campus. And I know that the isle seat 6 rows up from the front of the classroom is his. I would never try to sit in his seat.

So I ask you... after 2 months of school and over half of the semester... why is this kid sitting in MY seat!? It started happening about 3 weeks ago. I usually get to class about 5 minutes before it actually starts but one day I got caught up in lab work and got there right as the class was starting and he was in my seat. For a second I wasn't quite sure what to do. The class is pretty full and I didn't know where I should sit. I was completely taken aback. So begrudgingly I sat in his seat 2 rows behind my seat. This breached the barrier that I can see without my glasses so the board became an incomprehensible fuzzy blob. And I, of course, happened to forget my glasses at home that day so I had no idea what the hell was going on.

Who is this kid!? You can't just break the unspoken rule of the seating chart that was put into place the first week of school. You just can't. But I let it go because, sure, it was just once... right?

The next day of class I got there and sat in my seat and all was right with the world. But, I started staying closer to time at work and getting to class just before lecture started and EVERY single time this kid is sitting in my seat.

Oh and I know what you're thinking. This poor boy is trying to learn evolution just like the rest of us and probably has no idea that he is taking my seat. That's what I thought too. Give the poor kid the benefit of the doubt. But then one day I gave him "the look." You know - the look that says "Hey, I'm kind of pissed you keep taking my seat and I'd really appreciate it if you would move because... it is my seat." And you'll never guess what he did. Go on... guess!

No idea? I'll tell you: He smirked... and then laughed. He laughed at me! He totally knows what he is doing and what is worse is he is doing it on purpose. Is there no common decency left in the human race!? I think not.

So now I am in an ongoing battle to save my seat. I check my clock every 2 minutes at work to make sure that I leave on time to get there before he does so I can have the seat that I rightfully earned that first week of school!

And I made sure he knows that it is indeed on. Because last class I got there first and smirked at him... mature I know! We, apparently, are two very passive aggressive people. Needless to say he scowled at me. I have a feeling he is going to be getting to class earlier tomorrow.

As Darwin once said, it is indeed the survival of the fittest and you bet your ass I am going to win.

Darwin didn't actually say the part about betting, and ass and winning. I added that for effect but I am sure he thought about it when Wallace came up with his idea on evolution and was about to publish before Darwin himself did. But look, over 100 years later who do we see as the father of evolution? I'll give you a hint: It sure isn't Wallace. Because Darwin didn't let Wallace take his seat in history and I don't intend to be a Wallace.

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