"I Live to think for myself. I refuse to be a mindless sheep following the crowd into cookie-cutter oblivion. Otherwise I'd just be a zombie with no heart or passion in life" - Hervey Taylor IV

The Anorak

Friday, March 23, 2012

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Now that you and the rest of my family/friends/world knows I am officially leaving this fall for Michigan, the number one thing I have been told was to buy a parka. And buy a parka now while they are marked down for spring and summer.

At first, I just laughed and thought yep it is definitely going to be cold and I should look in to something warm to wear. I have 2 pea coats (more like raincoat) type of jackets that I really just bought because they are super cute. Then I have 1 wool coat. A wool coat I bought about 4 years ago... it's missing a button and the black has faded in to a more of a dark grey. And that is the extent of my coat collection.

You just don't need coats in Cruces. A good sweatshirt is all you ever really need. Or a nice sweater. 11 months out of the year you never need a coat and for that 1 month that you may need one, people just don't go outside.

Just a couple of stats for you:
  • Rain
    • Cruces: we're lucky if we get .25 inches a month
    • Ann Arbor: rains an average of 3 inches every month
  • High Temp
    • Cruces: It's March and we have already reached highs over 80 degrees and summers bring days with 95-110ish degrees
    • Ann Arbor: Highs are generally around 80-90 max with a record high of 105 in 1934. Only 3 months out of the year Ann Arbor has EVER reached over 100 degrees and it rarely gets over 90.
  • Low Temp
    • Hardly ever do we see temperatures under freezing. And if we do, it is in the middle of the night but never during the day.
    • About 4 months out of the year the average daily temperature is below freezing.
So... in summary... I am going to drown from all the rain and then freeze to the sidewalk. It is pretty much my decided fate in Ann Arbor.

In order to try my best to fight my destiny, though I think it may be hopeless, I decided I need to invest in coats... not only coats but parkas.

That is when I found myself in the mall looking in a department store in the coat section with a very concerned expression on my face. I looked through the meager 2 racks they had provided for me. And I found myself thinking... what in the world is a parka!?

No really... I don't have the slightest idea of what makes a coat a parka. I don't think I have ever even seen a parka. And that is when I knew for sure... I am indeed going to die in Ann Arbor.

I decided to do a parka google search. My good friend Wikipedia told me that a parka was originally called an anorak and made by the Eskimos. They are often fur/fake fur lined in order to keep you warmer and were originally made from caribou or seal.

Most importantly they are often ugly. Now it comes down to functionality and fashion. Do I really want to survive or do I want to look cute? Duh... I'm into surviving and being warm.

And there go all of my chances of finding a good boy in Ann Arbor. Damn parkas.

I was just informed that my "pea coats" are actually trench coats... and my wool coat is a pea coat.

Not only do I not know what a parka is... I apparently don't even know what a coat is. 

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